& so it begins

8/1/09 - 9/1/09 9/1/09 - 10/1/09 10/1/09 - 11/1/09 11/1/09 - 12/1/09 12/1/09 - 1/1/10 1/1/10 - 2/1/10 2/1/10 - 3/1/10 3/1/10 - 4/1/10 4/1/10 - 5/1/10 5/1/10 - 6/1/10 6/1/10 - 7/1/10 7/1/10 - 8/1/10 8/1/10 - 9/1/10 9/1/10 - 10/1/10 10/1/10 - 11/1/10 11/1/10 - 12/1/10 12/1/10 - 1/1/11 1/1/11 - 2/1/11 2/1/11 - 3/1/11 3/1/11 - 4/1/11 4/1/11 - 5/1/11 5/1/11 - 6/1/11 6/1/11 - 7/1/11 7/1/11 - 8/1/11 8/1/11 - 9/1/11 9/1/11 - 10/1/11 10/1/11 - 11/1/11 11/1/11 - 12/1/11 12/1/11 - 1/1/12 1/1/12 - 2/1/12 2/1/12 - 3/1/12 6/1/12 - 7/1/12 7/1/12 - 8/1/12 8/1/12 - 9/1/12 9/1/12 - 10/1/12 10/1/12 - 11/1/12 6/1/13 - 7/1/13 7/1/13 - 8/1/13 8/1/13 - 9/1/13 9/1/13 - 10/1/13 12/1/13 - 1/1/14 1/1/14 - 2/1/14 2/1/14 - 3/1/14 3/1/14 - 4/1/14 4/1/14 - 5/1/14


-good: i bought a floppy white hat. i always wanted a big floppy hat. i am happy.
-bad: i have no where to wear it. i always do that-buy things that i don't get to wear immediately. i still have clothes in my closet that i haven't worn but i think that happens to a lot of girls ;]

-good: i'm slowly getting my mind together and setting out things that i want to do on my own. i'm afraid of loneliness and it gets pretty bad. like i can't do things by myself, i need support from others. i hate how dependent i am. so i'm trying to change that. i'm finding my way on my own.
-bad: i miss an old friend but she's bad for me. the friendship became so fake when it ended and i don't want to go through it again. yet our conversations reminds me of the good times. maybe her attitudes have changed, but i don't know. i'm not in her life anymore. i always give into second chances but maybe not this time. i'll just keep things simple.

-good: i'm doing a clubbing event for my birthday.
-bad: i feel like no ones gonna go. :[

-good: my acne is slowly clearing up.
-bad: i'm getting fat. i can see it in my cheeks. i can see it in my tummy. i can see it in my waist/thighs. my bottoms are feeling tight. i don't want thunder thighs. i am slowly gaining all this weight and no one wants to say anything because they want me to gain weight. they want me to feel how they feel. i don't want that, sorry. time for gym.

-good: i borrowed books from the public library.
-bad: i'm not into the books that i borrowed and have barely touched them. my obsessions have grown to watching a tv series "avatar: the last airbender" after that obession i will go back to the books...maybe.

a friend of mine loves to do his little psychology analysis on people and he has done it on me. he made me realize more about myself that i should have already known. yet i still rely on my weakness and has succeeded nowhere.

my boyfriend said i was right about keeping good connections with people in high places. i told him that we should remain friends with those who will do more with their life. the owner of the physical therapy place my boyfriend works at gives free exams to his friend. so there you go. haha.

i'm not sleepy at all and it's almost 4am. i have work tomorrow but i'm hoping it'll be really slow. also it's really hot and i think i drank too much tea. boo. lesson learned. back to my obsession of avatar until i get sleepy. goodnight.